"How often have i said to you that when you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable,lmes must be the truth?"
what kind of parent actually says ‘if you get notes on a tumblr post i will do this thing for u’
(Source: , via aolopay)
I did it… I’ve finally caught them all…..
THIS IS ONE OF THOSE THINGS YOU THINK YOU’D NEVER SEE
i love how the guy filming this is just like “nah i aint gonna save him”
so you’re saying I can win 5 iphones every day??? and all I have to do is give my credit card number on this website I’ve never heard about??? well slam me in my tender butthole sir you’ve just got yourself a deal
Slam me in my tender butthole
I think I’ve just found my new favorite phrase.
when a girl changes her clothes in front of you, she’s either really interested or you’re level 99 friend-zoned
Or she hasn’t spotted you in the tree yet.
“Ah, Perry the platypus!”
“What an unexpected -“
“WAIT, WAIT, WAIT!”
“By societal convention!”
“Look! We’re in a fine dining environment. Everyone knows not to throw a scene in a fancy restaurant!”
“That’s right. You’re trapped. Sit down.”
This show is fucking brilliant.
PLEASE READ I’M BEGGING YOU GUYS TO HELP ME.
STOP SCROLLING :’(
This is my best friend, Billy. I’ve known him basically since I was born. Our parents were friends, and it was always the joke between our families that we were going to get married, since my parents happened to have a girl and his a guy, at the same time. He means a lot to me, even though he lives thousands of miles away from me right now. The important thing though, is that he’s gone missing. He is a danger to himself, suffering from depression and extensive drug use in the past year. He was going through rehabilitation, but now he’s missing. He’s disappeared. The last he was seen was in Juno Beach, Florida. This is off of northern Palm Beach County. He’s been missing since Sunday afternoon, over forty hours. The U.S. Coast Guard searched for him throughout Monday night, and they’re unsure that the search will continue any longer. He was last seen wearing a pair of green shorts. It’s uncertain whether he has gone missing deliberately, or the coast was too rough. This is one hundred percent serious and I’m terrified. If anybody in or near Palm Beach County has seen or heard from him, please please please contact his mother at (321) 750-3469. This is so serious, and only serious calls are wanted. Please help find my best friend. I’m lost without him.
there are hannah montana lyrics for whatever life throws at you
basically all my sentences start with one of these
- ok so
- no but seriously
- ok wow (or wow ok)
- but wait
- no wait
- wait what
- oh wow
- so like